Picking up where we left off at:
Ever feel like life is throwing you more curveballs than a professional baseball pitcher? Don’t worry—you’re not alone. The good news? There’s a way to not just dodge those curveballs but to catch them with grace and maybe even a little flair. Enter Psychological Flexibility—your mental superpower for adapting to whatever life throws at you. Let’s break down the six components that make up this resilience-boosting skill, with a sprinkle of humor to keep things light. I’ll include all the academic stuff at the end, so the nerds among us can dive deeper (no judgment—I’m one of them).
1. Acceptance
Picture this: You’ve just spilled coffee on your white shirt (again). Rather than cursing your caffeine addiction, psychological flexibility says, “Hey, it happened. Let’s roll with it.” Acceptance isn’t about loving every mishap; it’s about acknowledging reality without fighting it.
Studies show that acceptance helps reduce stress and improve emotional well-being (Hayes et al., 2006). So the next time life serves you lemons (or coffee stains), just think, "This too shall pass... after a quick change of clothes."
2. Cognitive Defusion
Ever been caught in a mental loop, replaying that awkward thing you said three years ago? Cognitive defusion is about creating distance from those pesky thoughts. It’s like telling your mind, “Thanks for sharing, but I’ll take it from here.”
Research suggests that defusion techniques help reduce the impact of negative thoughts (Hayes et al., 2012). So, next time your mind starts a rerun of your greatest hits of embarrassment, just hit the mental “skip” button.
3. Being Present
Yes, mindfulness is part of this, but let’s make it relatable. Being present is like finally noticing that you’ve been scrolling Instagram for an hour and deciding to actually pay attention to your surroundings. Spoiler alert: Life’s happening right in front of you, not just on your screen.
Living in the moment is linked to greater emotional regulation and life satisfaction (Brown & Ryan, 2003). So, put down your phone, look up, and maybe even enjoy that cup of coffee—before you spill it.
4. Self-as-Context
Think of this as seeing yourself as the sky and your thoughts and feelings as the weather—sometimes it’s sunny, sometimes it’s stormy, but you are not the weather. You’re the ever-present sky, chill and unbothered.
Research shows that adopting this perspective helps with emotional resilience (Hayes et al., 2006). So, when the storm clouds of stress roll in, remember that you’re the sky—capable of weathering anything.
5. Values
Remember when you declared, “I’m going to get in shape this year!”—right before ordering pizza? Values are like your personal GPS, guiding you toward what truly matters, even when distractions (like extra cheese) are tempting.
Aligning actions with values is linked to greater life satisfaction and well-being (Dahl et al., 2009). So, whether your value is health, kindness, or just being a decent human, let it guide your choices (but maybe still have that slice of pizza).
6. Committed Action
Finally, we have committed action—aka, doing the thing you said you were going to do. It’s like deciding to run that 5K you signed up for, even if you’d rather binge-watch Netflix in bed. Committed action means taking steps toward your goals, no matter how small.
Research supports that committed action leads to greater psychological flexibility and well-being (Bond & Bunce, 2003). So, lace up those running shoes, or at least take the first step—whatever that looks like for you.
And there you have it, the six components of psychological flexibility. Simple, right? Okay, maybe not that simple, but the great news is you don’t have to master all of them today. Start with being present or practicing acceptance, then build from there. Your mental flexibility will thank you!
For those who like to dive into the nitty-gritty (aka the citations), here are the academic
sources:
Dr. Ariel McGrew, Business Psychologist, Chief Creative Officer
Dr. Ariel McGrew is a highly regarded business psychologist and founder of Tactful Disruption®. With over 15 years of experience in U.S. Army Psychological Operations, she has honed her expertise in leadership and organizational dynamics. Dr. McGrew holds a PhD in Business Psychology, is a licensed professional counselor, and has been featured in Forbes Coaches Council. Her work focuses on enhancing mental health and professional development within organizations.
References
Baumeister, R. F., Campbell, J. D., Krueger, J. I., & Vohs, K. D. (2003). Does high self-esteem cause better performance, interpersonal success, happiness, or healthier lifestyles? Psychological Science in the Public Interest, 4(1), 1-44. https://doi.org/10.1111/1529-1006.01431
Bond, F. W., & Bunce, D. (2003). The role of acceptance and job control in mental health, job satisfaction, and work performance. Journal of Applied Psychology, 88(6), 1057-1067. https://doi.org/10.1037/0021-9010.88.6.1057
Bond, F. W., Flaxman, P. E., & Bunce, D. (2008). Work redesign: Reducing stress and enhancing psychological flexibility in the workplace. Journal of Applied Psychology, 93(3), 645–654. https://doi.org/10.1037/0021-9010.93.3.645
Brown, K. W., & Ryan, R. M. (2003). The benefits of being present: Mindfulness and its role in psychological well-being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(4), 822-848. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.84.4.822
Daks, J. S., & Rogge, R. D. (2020). Examining the correlates of psychological flexibility in romantic relationship and family dynamics: A meta-analysis. Journal of Contextual Behavioral Science, 18, 77–91. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jcbs.2020.09.002
Hayes, S. C., Luoma, J. B., Bond, F. W., Masuda, A., & Lillis, J. (2006). Acceptance and commitment therapy: Model, processes and outcomes. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 44(1), 1–25. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.brat.2005.06.006
Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2012). Acceptance and commitment therapy: The process and practice of mindful change (2nd ed.). Guilford Press(2009). The art and science of valuing in psychotherapy: Helping clients discover, explore, and commit to valued action using acceptance and commitment therapy. New Harbinger Publications.
Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2012). Acceptance and commitment therapy: The process and practice of mindful change (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.
Hayes, S. C., Luoma, J. B., Bond, F. W., Masuda, A., & Lillis, J. (2006). Acceptance and commitment therapy: Model, processes and outcomes. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 44(1), 1-25. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.brat.2005.06.006
Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2012). Acceptance and commitment therapy: The process and practice of mindful change (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.
Linehan, M. M. (1993). Cognitive-behavioral treatment of borderline personality disorder. Guilford Press.
McCracken, L. M., & Morley, S. (2014). The psychological flexibility model: a basis for integration and progress in psychological approaches to chronic pain management. The journal of pain, 15(3), 221–234. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jpain.2013.10.014
Neff, K. D. (2003). The development and validation of a scale to measure self-compassion. Self and Identity, 2(3), 223-250. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298860309027
Ryan, R. M., & Deci, E. L. (2001). On happiness and human potentials: A review of research on hedonic and eudaimonic well-being. Annual Review of Psychology, 52(1), 141-166. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev.psych.52.1.141
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